Fri Jan 10 2020

The big snowstorm that brought the city to a standstill was finally cleaned up. Bobbie’s mother Florence moved into one of the motel suites and she insisted on paying for the room.

For the two snowed in days Bobbie, Trixie and Barb chatted and made plans. Using the notes from Townes that Bobbie had, they prepared a business plan for the new condo development opportunity that Bobbie discussed with the mayor at the new years party. They decided to call the project Eastpoint condos, because it was located on the Eastern side of the point. Bobbie was to drop the plan off at the mayor’s office herself, on Wednesday.

They also worked on the Stargazer Condo’s final stage. Bobbie closed her computer. “I’d like to have Stargazer done before We start on Eastpoint. I think it’s a good idea to use the same plans. We’ll just reverse them because they point in the opposite direction.”

Trixie nodded. “It will take a while to get all the survey plans and environmental studies and planning permissions and all that. The mayor has promised the same sort of deal as Stargazer so there shouldn’t be any trouble with access roads. Maybe I can explain it all on my finance segment of the news. I’ll scale it back for someone who wants to build their own house; explain how to navigate the permits and stuff.”

Bobbie got up to check on Maddy. “That sounds good Trixie, I’ll have to watch it.”

Barb promised to call the building crews that worked on the start of the Stargazer project so they could plan for the new project.

Trixie and Barb left on Wednesday morning with plans made and Bobbie cleaned the snow off her car and took Maddy over to Charlie’s for the day. June was really pregnant and Bobbie offered to come to stay with all the kids when she and Charlie had to go to the hospital. June told her to expect a call anytime.

She drove to the mayor’s office and dropped of her condo proposal with the assistant and drove back to the motel to start helping her mom with her fire insurance claim for the house.

The house was demolished. When the fire marshal gave the clear; Florence got Johnny to help dig out her big safe and found it was intact and had all her important documents, including the insurance policy and her most treasured jewellery pieces.

“So, your insurance looks pretty straightforward Mom.”

Florence nodded. “Yes, your father made sure we had the best coverage and he made a video of all our most valuable things and put it on this.” She held up a USB. “I think they will even pay for my motel suite for a while. It’s been hard, going through all of the things I got from the safe. I mean I’m glad it was salvaged but it’s really hitting home that I’ve just lost the home where I raised my kids, where my husband and I grew our lives, where family and friends gathered to both celebrate and grieve and where I built my career. It so hard to imagine that I can hold on to all of that. It feels like I’m losing it, along with the house.

It broke Bobbie’s heart to realize her mom was so upset. She went over and hugged her. “Mom, I can only imagine how you feel. I know the feeling of giving up your home and career. I’ve only been retired for just over a year but I have this feeling that those 30 years, that were a big part of my identity, is gone. Now when I meet people, they have no idea that I had a life before being a grandmother.”

“You are right of course Bobbie; I just have to come to grips with not being a practising doctor. I used to make life and death decisions and now I have this burning desire to take a drive by the shore and visit the old family homestead to connect to something. I know it’s not practical in the winter. Before my house burned; I felt so overwhelmed by maintenance and downsizing and all that and I just couldn’t imagine having the emotional energy to work on the place where I grew up. Now I think I want to help you.”

“That’s great Mom. Look I have an appointment with a therapist; why don’t I call her and see if we can go together. It sounds like we have similar feelings to deal with.”

“I don’t know. I’m not that eager to talk about my feelings with a stranger. I think you and I can work these things out.”

“Maybe you are right Mom, but let’s just give it a try.”

An hour later they walked into the therapist office. Bobbie sat knitting a sock to calm her nerves and gather her thoughts and Florence walked around looking at the professional certificates on the wall.

After a few minutes a tall young woman in dress pants and a nice blouse came out of an office. “Florence and Roberta?”

Bobbie stowed her knitting and stood. “Hi Dr. Varma. I’m Roberta but you can call me Bobbie.”

The Doctor ushered them in. Bobbie was surprised at how young she seemed and smiled to herself, wondering what Florence was thinking. They sat in two chairs on one side of the desk and Bobbie put her journal on the desk. “This is my feelings journal. I made this to help me organize my thoughts and concerns.”

The Doctor picked it up and looked through it. “This is pretty good Bobbie; you are very artistic. Perhaps you can read a page to us out loud and we can see what we can discuss and then Florence you can bring up something you would like to talk about.”

Bobbie took the journal back and turned the page and found something to read. “I love being a gramma. All my grandchildren are special but I just adopted a grand child and now have to be her parents and her gramma too. I worry a bit that my other grand kids might feel left out…”

Florence waved her hand. “The new little grand child Maddy, is the daughter of the daughter I made Bobbie give up for adoption. Back then, Bobbie was still in high school and I was starting the first chapter of planned parenthood in Crow Harbour. I was unreasonable. Bobbie was heartbroken but survived and thrived but I don’t think I ever told her how bad I felt.”

Bobbie frowned. “You never told me? You wouldn’t even talk to me the whole time I was pregnant.”

“I know, I felt bad because I hid you in the country and made you give your baby away. I wasn’t a super religious person who thought you were a sinner. I felt bad because I hadn’t ensured you had proper birth control and was selfish, thinking about my career first.

“Mom. Either way mom, you were ashamed of me. Anyway, my life would have been very different. I would have been held back in High school. I wouldn’t have gone to university that year and met Alex. I would have stayed with Peter and never have had Charlie and Eddy. I would have missed so much. I have Maddy now and I promised Etta, I would raise her like my own. I’m just sad I didn’t know Etta better; she passed away the day after I met her.”

“Oh Bobbie, I wasn’t really ashamed of you. I was mad at myself.”

“I think we’re over that Mom. We’re close now. You and Dad were the best grandparents to Eddy and Charlie.”

Florence put her head in her hands. “I never told you Bobbie. I knew when Etta’s adoptive parents were in the car crash, I saw it in the paper. I learned she went to her grandmother and I hired the lawyer and gave him money to give to the grandmother and I built the trust fund for Etta’s college.”

Bobbie looked at her mother. “You knew her parents died? Did you know when her grandmother died and she had to go into foster care?” Bobbie didn’t wait for an answer. She put her journal in her purse and said, “Thank you Dr, Varma, I think our hour is up.” Then she stood up and headed for the door.

Florence wasn’t sure what to do so she followed. Florence’s mind was racing. She regretted telling Bobbie the truth about Etta but she was tired of keeping the secret. Not that she wasn’t good at keeping secrets. Well, some secrets would die with her but she wanted Bobbie to know she actually cared for Etta too. She wasn’t selfishly easing her conscious. She couldn’t be what she should for Maddy if she didn’t clear the air.

Bobbie was sitting in the car fuming. Her mind was racing, thinking how it would have been if she and Alex could have been there for Etta. She looked out at her mom moving gingerly across the icy parking lot and sighed. Her Mom was old. Bobbie could play the “what if” game but she had to be present for Maddy, and knew she really didn’t have that much time left with her mother. She got out of the car, opened the passenger door for Florence and took her arm. She paused. “Mom, Thanks for letting me know you looked after Etta. We have to make a good life for Maddy now.”

For her part Dr Varma was looking out the window watching Bobbie help her mother into the car. They would be fine. She wondered if Bobbie would ever make another appointment. She doubted it. The feelings journal was good . She had a couple clients who might like to do that.

Bobbie and Florence decided to stop for a coffee and doughnut Bobbie tried to make light conversation. “How are you feeling Mom? Do you still want to go shopping?”

Florence wiped her hands on a napkin. “I think the coffee and doughnut is giving me a bit more energy. Do you think we could go to the big box store? I need to get some basic clothes. I need underwear and everything since the fire.”

“I’ll text Barb to meet us there she wanted to get some new things because she’s lost so much weight.”

They drove to the store and amazingly managed to find Barb in the big parking lot and park near her. They all linked arms and went into the store. All three of them were members so they all showed their ID’s and laughed. They had one of the giant carts and headed over to the ladies wear.

Florence had a list and stopped at a big stack of sneakers. “Look at these, you can step right in. You don’t even need to tie laces. I’d like a white pair, a red pair and a blue pair.”

They put them in the cart. Bobbie grabbed a white pair; they were really comfy. Next, they went over to the underwear and Barb and Florence was combing through the display looking for their size and Bobbie found some nice-looking pyjamas. She there were three different designs so she found 3 mediums and took them over to her mom. “These look really comfy, see how soft they are. A lady over there said they ran small so I got you mediums.”

They got sports Bras and cotton socks and then started to look for lounge wear. Florence always wore cotton velour track suits that she must have bought in the 1980’s as her house wear.

She thumbed through the piles of lady’s yoga pants. “I don’t really like any of these.”

Bobbie looked over to the men’s wear. What about these jogging pants Mum, they are on sale because there aren’t many left, they have lots of pockets.

Florence walked over. “Ooh they are a soft cotton. There’s mostly men’s extra small size left.” She held up a pair and determined they would fit. She got a black pair, a blue pair a green pair and dug around and found an off-white pair.”

Barb came by. “Wow, look at those, and they are only 10 dollars. The yoga pants don’t even have pockets.” She found a pair that would fit.

They found some nice fine merino long sleeved tee shirts. Bobbie bought two of those and Barb and Florence loaded up. Then they found some very soft oversized acrylic/cotton blend sweaters.

Florence leaned against the cart. “I’m getting tired but I should go over to the pharmacy to get some soap and vitamins and stuff. I have enough to tide me over as long as I’m staying at the motel. When my condo is done, I’ll need kitchenware, furniture and linen and everything.”

“Well, we don’t have to buy anything today but my storage container has a lot of space if you need it Mom. If you’re getting Lorne to be your designer. He’ll buy all your furniture and stuff if you want him to.”

Florence nodded. “I’m just glad that Lorne moved out before the fire. Imagine if he’d been up there when the fire started.”

They were in the parking lot sorting out what each of them had bought. Bobbie found her two tees right away. Barb was looking through the box. “All our stuff is mixed together Florence, why don’t I take you back to the motel, where we can sort this out and Bobbie can go get Maddy at Charlies and meet us back there.”

Bobbie nodded. “I’ll get Pizzas from Mark and we can watch Trixie on TV. Her segment is on tonight.”